One very important thing to keep in mind is that you cannot propose with a moissanite the same way you would with a diamond ring. Diamonds are the norm and expected, and if your potential fiance isn’t aware that it’s a moissanite, they could get let down. This is a decision that must be made together!
An unhappy surprise
Consider this woman’s story:
My fiance just recently proposed at his sisters wedding reception (our 1 year anniversary). We went shopping for rings 6 months prior to this, and he got me the exact setting that I wanted…but it’s a fake diamond. The ring has side stones, which are real diamonds, and they are more prettier than the center moissanite. I thought it was a fake because I knew we didn’t have the money for him to buy it, and the color is not great. The day after he proposed he told me it was a fake, and I was truly hurt. He told me later on after we get married that we could upgrade the stone to a real diamond. I’m really hurt by his selection and told him I was a little offended. He was really upset because he thinks the ring is spectacular. No further discussions have been brought up by either of us… he broke down crying when I told him I was disappointed. I feel that your engagement ring should be something that the girl likes, and the guy shouldn’t go the cheap way because it should be worn for the rest of your life. Any advice on how I can change my ring? I know I’m not marrying the ring, and I do love him very much, I however think I deserve something I like.
You must prepare her!
If you’re thinking about proposing with a moissanite engagement ring, you must talk to you fiance before do it. I’m not saying let her know after you propose – you must do it beforehand! Yes, this could take away some of the surprise and romance, but not doing so could be perceived as deceptive and start your marriage off rocky.
To avoid spoiling the surprise try casually dropping it in conversation somehow. Mention a friend you know that just got engaged to with a diamond alternative. What does she think about that? If you get the conversation flowing about this without giving the hint that a proposal is coming then you can still keep the excitement!
A happier ending
Check out this woman’s perspective which ended a lot better because she was involved in the decision process:
My engagement ring cost $375 – guess how I feel? Ecstatic! My fiancee ordered me a custom ring off Etsy that is my absolute dream (in fact, we picked it out together) and the best part is the seller gave me a great deal and it was only $375 including tax and shipping! I’m sure it’s more than some people spend, but it’s way way less than most people spend, and I find myself wondering why on earth anyone forks over several thousand for a diamond when, in my humble opinion, my ring is just as beautiful if not more, and hand-made to boot. (For anyone wondering, it’s a .5 carat moissanite in a simple bezel setting.) I just had to tell someone because I am just bursting with happiness. : )
So remember – talk to her before you purchase a moissanite ring!
By Erika August 30, 2013 - 5:39 pm
If she really cares about a diamond that much, you’ve picked an expensive one. Have fun going into debt to satisfy her demands.
By Angelique January 14, 2014 - 6:57 pm
I absolutely agree to this comment. I thought it was kind of ignorant that she cared that much. So what if its not a real diamond? It’s the thought that counts… and plus it shouldn’t matter if you love the guy!!
By Bigburd November 5, 2014 - 8:49 am
Best answer !
It’s the thought not the possession.
( if the best things in life are not things! Then why is she hung up on materials ? The gem is the one who have it to you. He must have wide eyes & yours must be narrow )
By Linda January 17, 2015 - 4:04 am
Totally agree! How shallow she is!
By Nikki November 26, 2013 - 12:22 pm
Why would anyone want a stone that has the potential to fund war lords and was used as a superficial symbol of love by De Beers? I certainly do not want my engagement to be represented by a blood diamond nor am I the type of lady who falls for advertisements and society’s expectations.
By Dan December 2, 2013 - 2:19 pm
The first story is just terrible six ways from Sunday. Proposed at your own sister’s wedding? Clearly didn’t even talk about proposing before he did it? The response, which is warranted in part, doesn’t pass the smell test either. “More prettier”? Did she say this before or after finding out it was moissanite? If half of jewelers can’t tell under a loupe, no way in hell she can.
By Angelique January 14, 2014 - 6:58 pm
agreed. She was very ignorant
By Bri February 14, 2014 - 12:10 am
My significant other proposed in 2001 but waited to get me involved in choosing a ring. I didn’t want diamonds in my ring due to the conflict diamond issue and the way DeBeers had artificially inflated prices (though I had experimented on their website with their custom design tool).
I had seen the story about moissanite on TV and I knew that’s what I wanted, so we went to a local jeweler who did custom work. At first, he wasn’t too thrilled about the idea of working with moissanite. He said it had taken business away from him, but he never explained what he meant by that. Anyway, we got him on board and he located the stones, a 1.5 carat equivalent heart-shaped one for the center and two 0.23 carat equivalent marquis ones to flank it. The completed ring had a 14K white gold setting and a 14K yellow gold band.
When the ladies at work saw it, they went nuts! Of course, I never told them the truth.
Fortunately, we didn’t get married (he turned out to be quite a bad person). I’m finally getting around to selling the ring now because I need the money. I don’t know if I’ll get much for it. I managed to get a copy of the original receipt from the jeweler. He charged my ex over $2,000 for that ring. I don’t know if that was due to the customization fee or if it was anywhere close to justified for the larger size of the center stone. I do know that my ex knew absolutely nothing about these things and wouldn’t have questioned what he was charged. Nonetheless, though I have many regrets, the ring isn’t one of them.
By Shane Stone February 14, 2014 - 5:58 am
Hi Bri – thanks for sharing! Sorry to hear you have no need for your ring anymore, but glad you don’t regret it!
By Stephanie April 10, 2014 - 7:17 pm
My fiancé got a moissanite ring for me and I think its great! It looks beautiful and we didn’t have to spend a fortune on it. We’d rather spend our money on travel and saving for a wedding and family. So for us, diamonds aren’t worth it. Plus, moissanite is conflict free 🙂
By Janet Manely April 22, 2014 - 9:08 pm
Moissanite is a fake stone manufactured to imitate a diamond. Moissanite is faceted in third world countries where the workers are taken advantage of! The factory where the moissanite is manufactured from the chemicals silicon carbide also pollutes the environment!
Yes every girl dreams of a fake diamond engagement ring and is happy when others mistake it for the real thing. !
By Djm May 15, 2014 - 10:50 am
Not every girl, just the ones worth marrying.
By Connie November 2, 2014 - 12:21 am
Not true. The largest producer is growing them right here in the US and gemologists hand cut them. Machines can not do that kind of work. Moissanite is not a fake stone, it is a semi-precious stone that is lab grown because it is only found naturally in very few places in the world and the cost of mining it, with the media, DeBeers and societal push that only a diamond can be a girls best friend, would make the price unaffordable.
By Jeff August 25, 2014 - 9:58 am
I bought a Moissanite engagement just for the proposal so my fiancé can pick out the real diamond she wants after the event. As much as we’ve talked “around” it, I still want to have a ring on proposal day that she has not seen. The same day I will tell her that it is not the “real” ring and she will be fine with that knowing that she can pick out a ring to her liking with a real diamond. This way I can still make the proposal a surprise with a beautiful ring and in the end, she will still get the diamond she wants. I just had to factor in the cost of an extra $375.00. No big deal in the big picture of things. As nice as these stones are, a diamond is still the real thing. In this case, there is method to the madness. After she gets her real diamond she can either keep the Moissanite ring or give it to our daughter or some other use of her choice. But the moissanite is a beautiful stone no matter the use.
By Gia Dhillon September 16, 2014 - 1:10 am
How sad I care about the way he treats me how hard he works and how he’s gonna satisfy my every need to the best of his ability. This is consumer culture at its finest when bimbos push men to the brink of ruin over a ring. Your a gold digger, let’s see the ring you have him I hope it’s expensive and 100% real. I have instructed my bf to NEVER get me a ring more than 300 infact the ring I want is really cheap 165 it’s sterling I love the design. It’s what I want. He will get it I know him. But my goodness would you bimbos stop. Making women look stupid since the 50’s ..diggers.
By Lisa November 1, 2014 - 8:59 am
Wow GIA I am surprised you were able to get your rude and aggressive comments published on a blog! Tell us what you really think – no as a matter of fact, please don’t.
By Roxie September 30, 2014 - 11:31 pm
First thing to know is Moissanite is not a fake diamond it is a precious gem stone.. in fact it is it’s very own precious gem stone that is recognized by the GIA. It has 97% of the same qualities of a diamond. It is 15% more brilliant than a diamond and the most brilliant Gem Stone in the world. The wonderful thing it’s only a 10th of the cost of a diamond. In fact it is so similar to a diamond that when it first started out jewelers couldn’t tell the difference between a diamond and a moissanite and the diamond readers would always detect moissanite as a diamond. A moissanite stone is harder than a ruby, emerald or sapphire and is rated just below diamond in hardness. It will never loose its brilliance or luster, it’s truly a beautiful stone that actually came from the stars. This stone will last you a lifetime and more to come. I sale the Charles & Colvard moissanite via a direct sales company called Lulu Avenue. I have many moissanite piece and am constantly getting compliments. Moissanite is simply the smart choice compared to a diamond.
By Connie November 2, 2014 - 12:24 am
You tell it Roxie
By Scepticle Cynic November 12, 2014 - 7:33 pm
A moissanite is a really good stone to replace a real diamond. A person that is sound of mind would know that the DeBeers have made real natural diamonds too expensive for most of us, a scam. They are not worth what you pay for a natural diamond. Most natural diamonds have a fair number of impurities (inclusions) and only the most costly have only a few so small that they cannot be seen under 10 power magnification. Held side by side in day light no one can pick the moissanite from the real natural diamond. Natural diamonds may get chipped or damaged while wearing them sometimes…this is a real bummer. If that happens to a moissanite the bummer isn’t nearly as upsetting. Only a jeweler can tell by looking at one if it is a moissanite or a natural diamond and even he has to use magnificatiion. If your girl is concerned with economy she will see that the money spent over the price of a moissanite can be used better elsewhere.
By Scepticle Cynic November 12, 2014 - 7:35 pm
Yeah, I know skeptical isn’t spelled right
By Lindau37 January 15, 2015 - 3:23 am
My bf and I are looking to get engaged and I am strongly suggesting getting the Moissanite. I am shocked at the prices of diamonds these days and they are not even nice!! I have had Moissanite in the past and think they are gorgeous. I would rather save the extra money for our retirement. (I admit at first I would’ve never considered this option, but after careful thought….why not?? If it gets lost or stolen it’s not a huge heartship and the stone is as stunning as a far more expensive diamond.). To me it is a no brainier.
By Alan January 25, 2015 - 6:51 am
Whoa! Run, don’t walk, away from anyone who would be dissapointed. There’s a lot more trouble coming if they are already like that. That will not change.
By Lisa March 8, 2015 - 11:12 pm
Definitely talk about it first. My husband suggested Moissanite and I told him I just wanted a smaller diamond if it was about the cost. It’s silly to criticize someone for being disappointed in the ring they are going to wear every day.
Don’t get so caught up in the idea “it’s the thought that counts” that the thought turns into “I don’t care what my fiancee wants she should suck it up because it came from me” because that’s a terrible way to view giving something to someone you care about.
By Ann March 12, 2015 - 5:46 am
wow… that first “story” is not only sad, it makes women sound so shallow! Here’s what I noticed about that proposal….. he paid attention to what you wanted, bought you the exact same setting, worked with what he had to make sure you got what you wanted. That’s so sweet!! Who cares if it’s not a diamond…. and stop thinking of it as a fake! Moissanite is NOT a fake diamond. It is a moissanite, an eniterly different gemstone. That’s like calling a cat, a fake dog. … A CZ is a fake diamond, a moissanite is a moissanite, and they are stunningly gorgeous, lasts a lifetime, economically responsible, … They are both just a rock….. is it really worth fighting over a rock!?
I have been married for 17 years, got married at 19. We couldn’t even afford a pebble. My first ring was a $20 ring from a tiny little shop we picked up near the coast. Over the years we have upgraded and I eventually ended up with a very lovely 1.5 ct diamond set. I JUST sold for $2,800. … with that money, I bought my daughter a 1 ct moissanite ring ( for her 16th birthday) and upgraded my set to a 3 ct moissanite set. Yes, I consider a trading my 1.5 ct diamond for a 3 ct moissanite an upgrade!! … My excitement for the gem has influenced my daughter, and she too is over the moon for moissanite ( thank goodness, I’d hate to think she might end up one of those shallow women who crush the heart of the young man proposing, due to a stupid rock.) Don’t you just hate 1st world problems * **sarcasm.
By Justin Caiss March 12, 2015 - 6:20 am
I’m going to get my fiancé a small diamond ring, a big Moissanite and a beautiful pink Morganite ring with rose gold. All 3 and she can choose which one to wear on a daily basis. I don’t plan on spending a fortune and I think the (Routine) of Diamond engagement rings are more for a woman showing off for other woman. Which is strange because I thought it was more about the two about to be married. But it’s the future wife I want to make happy so I’ll let her choose.
By Leslie March 25, 2015 - 2:12 pm
So for the likes of Angelique who didn’t get married but kept the ring and is now trying to sell it….. Isn’t her ex-fiancé happy he didn’t spring for a real diamond. I have been looking for a 1 1/2 carat nice diamond and they run about $8. – $10 thousand just for the stone. Now add $3,000. For the semi-mount. Then you break up. You are out $13,000.
Most young people getting married (or any age) don’t have $13,000 to throw away.
Also, I know some girls that want to get engaged, push for a big ring knowing they will keep the ring if it doesn’t work out. Be smart, get a Moissanite. I was a jewelry buyer years ago and I love jewelry. The minute you walk out of the jewelry store the ring is worth 25% of what you just paid for it. Don’t tell people it’s a Moissanite and they will never know. Put the money in your nest egg, you will be glad you did.
By Tom April 20, 2015 - 9:01 am
90% of the worlds diamonds are run through India. These include conflict and non-conflict diamonds. They get mixed in together and things get a little blurry. In fact, so blurry that the world organization that ensures diamonds are categorized properly has become ineffective and is being critizised for its inability to trace non-conflict diamonds. As such, it’s estimated that 25% of the diamonds on the global market are, in fact, blood diamonds. Forced labour, amputations, executions, starvation, torture and child-labour are all part of what blood diamonds are about. Second, the processing markets in India are horrific places for workers. A cutter/polisher will usually have severe eyesight loss or blindness by their mid 30’s due to diamond dust exposure, and likely some form of degenerative lung disease.
Theres a strong likelihood that the diamond you’re considering purchasing has been brought to market by means of violence, child-labour or worker suffering. All this information is easily and readily available for everyone to access on the internet. Knowing this, if you still choose to buy diamonds as an expression of your love and devotion, or if you insist that “you’re worth it”, you are condoning and endorsing modern slavery and other horrific conditions endured by third world country people.
By Shane Stone April 20, 2015 - 10:22 am
That’s pretty scary!!
By Timo February 28, 2016 - 10:47 am
I like the way “Gia” called some women out on being gold diggers. She is right. It’s just the way it is. Many women nowadays behave like little spoiled brats. What does a man get from a woman as an engagement present? Why do these women feel so entitled to a man spending a quarter or a third of his year’s wage just to buy her a ring? Such women put up double standards. If she lets him spend a fortune, it’s good behavior. If he expects the same from her, he’s going cheap. If he expects her to get him a beer, it’s degrading. But then she expects him to carry her heavy stuff, and calls it what a “gentleman” has to do.
These examples are just the tip of the iceberg. I’ll never ever buy an engagement ring in my entire life. Nor will I ever marry or have kids. Not as long as society and even the law (no fault divorce, woman taking half of my stuff + the kids + alimony payments) back up such behavior by women.
By Steve k February 13, 2017 - 5:57 am
Women taking half of “my” stuff…
If it’s still “your” stuff and you’re at the age where you’re reading articles about rings and marriage…I dunno.
Clearly you still have not met someone you actually trust and love. When that day comes “your” stuff will not be yours anymore.
Mine, mine, mine. Sounds just like the alleged “gold diggers” you talk of. I understand not working and expecting everything for nothing is garbage but just because you earned it doesn’t make you a good person especially if you’re not willing to share it.
Sorry if I come off like I’m attacking but it just makes me sad when I hear someone say things like that. Hopefully some of those laws will change and make a marriage easier for you.
By Cassiee January 28, 2021 - 12:47 am
Does no one know that a Moissanite isn’t a fake Diamond? In fact it’s extremely rare, so much so that the Moissanite we have today is lab created. It was originally discovered in a meteorite. How cool? It has a hardness of 9.25 making it extremely durable as an everyday stone. I love my Moissanite ring. I specifically wanted a Moissanite because spending that much money on, let’s be honest, a pretty rock, physically makes me ill. I don’t think it’s realistic to expect my FH to spend 3-10k on a piece of jewelry, in fact I find it ridiculous.